What to agree on menus, shopping and frequency

You're standing in your kitchen on a Wednesday evening, realising that between work deadlines, school runs and everything else, you haven't planned what's for dinner—again. A personal chef sounds like relief, but before you book, you need to be clear about what you're actually asking them to prepare, how often they'll come, and who's paying for the ingredients. These three conversations—menu, shopping and frequency—are what separate a smooth working relationship from one that falls apart after three weeks.

What "menu" really means between you and your chef

When you talk menus with a personal chef, you're not handing them a restaurant's printed list. You're describing what your household actually eats. This is the moment to be honest about preferences that matter: foods you dislike, textures that don't work for you, cuisines your family gravitates toward, and any meals that feel like a treat versus everyday fuel.

Some households want variety—a different dinner each night, a rotating plan across weeks. Others prefer simplicity: the same five meals in rotation so shopping is predictable and cooking is efficient. Neither is wrong; it depends on what you're after. A chef working with a family with young children and picky eaters might prepare three core meals and repeat them, while someone cooking for a couple who enjoy experimentation might plan fresh dishes weekly.

Discuss how much input you want to have. Do you want to approve every menu in advance, or do you trust the chef to propose dishes within your guidelines and surprise you? Are there ingredients you always want on hand, or dietary restrictions (allergies, intolerances, religious requirements, ethical choices) that become non-negotiables for every meal? Be specific here. "Healthy" means nothing; "I want one vegetarian dinner, no spicy foods, and meals that take 45 minutes or less to cook" means everything.

Shopping: who buys, who pays, what's included

This is where assumptions crack relationships. Some chefs expect you to buy and stock everything; others do the shopping themselves and invoice you for groceries. Some work from a list you approve; others build menus around what's on sale or in season and adjust as they go. You need to agree which model works for you.

If the chef shops, ask how they handle the receipt—do they send you photos, an itemised list, or just hand over the groceries? Will they shop locally or at a chain? How far ahead do they plan? Do they buy premium versions of staples, or budget-friendly equivalents? These decisions affect both cost and the experience of eating what they prepare.

Also clarify what "shopping" covers. Does the chef buy pantry staples (oil, salt, spices) or only fresh ingredients for your specific meals? If you already have basics at home, they shouldn't duplicate them. If you want organic produce or meat from a specific butcher, say so upfront and factor that into your budget conversation. Some households set a weekly or monthly grocery cap; others say "buy what you need for the menu we've agreed." Find the arrangement that's transparent for both of you.

Frequency: what fits your household and budget

How often does a personal chef actually come to cook? Weekly? Twice a week? Every weekday? Once a fortnight to batch-prep meals you reheat? This changes everything—their schedule, your costs, whether you need to free up kitchen space, and how fresh the food stays.

Some people use a chef for two or three days a week to cover the busiest stretch; others want meals ready five days running. Some households prefer one longer session where the chef cooks and preps everything; others like shorter visits on multiple days. Think about your actual life: when do you most need help? What rhythm feels realistic to maintain long-term?

Frequency also shapes shopping logistics. If a chef visits once a week, they might buy for the whole week upfront. If they come three times weekly, they might shop more frequently or more flexibly. Agree on this together, because it affects both the freshness of ingredients and how much kitchen space you need to keep ingredients organised.

Moving from agreement to action

Before you book, write down—even in a message—what you've settled on: the types of meals, who's shopping and paying for groceries, and how many times per week the chef will be in your kitchen. Share this with your potential chef so they can confirm they're comfortable with the arrangement. If they push back or suggest changes, that's useful information about whether you're aligned.

When you're ready to find someone who matches these specifics, search on Strove for personal chefs in your area, read through their profiles and see who mentions the meal frequency and shopping model you're after. A chef whose description matches yours from the start saves time and misunderstandings later.